Saturday, May 29, 2010

But.....I DID enjoy my meal!!

Yesterday, I had lunch at Red Lobster on the Gulf Coast with my daughter and some friends of ours. I very much so ENJOYED the company.

My daughter split an appetizer, a seafood nacho platter, with someone else, but I tasted a small portion of it. Very ENJOYABLE! I ordered unsweetened tea with lemon. ENJOYED! The cheese biscuits came out and I "ENJOYABLY" ate one of those while waiting on my order, a grilled shrimp salad and gumbo in a bread bowl. The salad, I ENJOYED. Every lettuce leaf, shrimp, tomato, cucumber, croƻton, etc. was good. The gumbo, well, NOT SO ENJOYABLE. As a matter of fact it tasted so nasty I could not eat it. I took about three bites, hoping each time the next one would be better, but it was not, instead it got worse. I moved it off of my plate and placed it by my daughter so she could try it. She felt the same way I did, so the bowl of gumbo pretty much looked untouched.

Not one time did it ever cross my mind to complain. I was plenty full after having eaten: a portion of an appetizer, a cheese biscuit, a grilled shrimp salad, french bread, and two glasses of tea.


When the waiter came to ask how we wanted our tickets divided, I told him to put mine and my daughter's together. I truly never expected to hear what he was about to say to me: "You will not have a ticket because you did NOT ENJOY your meal". I wanted to argue, but decided to not spoil the "moment". It was an unbelievable one, and one that left me speechless for a second or two. I almost felt guilty, no I actually DID feel guilty, because I did ENJOY my meal! But, his unexpected act of kindness had just made it all the more ENJOYABLE!

After he left our table, the others began teasing: "Well, we didn't enjoy our meal either!?"

(By the way, I left him a sizable tip that more than covered my portion of the food I had eaten!)

Wouldn't this world be a more ENJOYABLE place to live in if more people were like my very observant and generous waiter at Red Lobster??

Tuesday, May 11, 2010


I observe things.  I have always been able to see and hear the tiniest of details, ones that maybe no one else can.  Sometimes this is a good thing and sometimes it is not. 

This past Saturday, the day before Mother's Day, I made a discovery.  I was not shocked or angry, but rather sad and disappointed.  It was confirmation to something already suspected.  My husband and I discussed when and how to handle the situation.  He decided it would be best to allow some time to pass and he would take the responsibility of revealing the discovery.   

(I hate it when someone posts just enough information on facebook to leave everyone guessing.  I have always thought they should share all or nothing.  And now here I am doing the same thing on my blog.)

I am sorry that I have to be vague about my "discovery", but I had to mention it because it is one of the reasons for this:



After my "discovery" on Saturday, I had some errands to run. While busying myself in town and dealing with discouragement, I received this e-mail:   "Hi Lynn. Just wanted to tell you I think you are a terrific mom, and I have always looked up to you in so many ways, but especially as a mother. I love you... Happy Mothers Day!!!"

It was from a friend who lost her toddler son several years ago in an extremely  tragic accident.

I responded: Oh, ______! years to come...I will be able to share with you what your words meant to me on this very day. I am always awestruck when I see God do something and today He did. Thank you for being his mouthpiece. As a mother, you have walked where many of us have not and I so admire your strength and courage. I love you,too. Happy Mothers Day.


On the way to church Sunday, we were listening to a Casting Crown's CD.  My husband commented on the words to the song that was playing, questioning their meaning.  I pulled the cover out of the plastic case and started reading the introduction. It was not until later that I realized I had read the wrong intro.  The one I read was for the song, "Stained Glass Masquerade".  I do not have the cover available to document the intro word for word, but it talked of hypocrites, somebody who pretends to have admirable principles, beliefs, or feelings, but behave otherwise. Here are the lyrics to the chorus:

Are we happy plastic people
Under shiny plastic steeples
With walls around our weakness
And smiles to hide our pain
But if the invitation's open
To every heart that has been broken
Maybe then we close the curtain
On our stained glass masquerade
Is there anyone who's been there
Are there any hands to raise
Am I the only one who's traded
In the altar for a stage
The performance is convincing
And we know every line by heart
Only when no one is watching
Can we really fall apart
But would it set me free
If I dared to let you see
The truth behind the person
That you imagine me to be

It was not by accident that I read these words.  Hopefully, they planted a seed in a heart that needs to understand truth.  They put a situation into perspective and possibly gave my husband the spring board he will use when he is faced with the confrontation to reveal my "discovery".   


Through the unanswered phone calls, unanswered text messages, and unreturned calls over the past couple of weeks, I have sensed her pulling away, AGAIN.  She spent the afternoon at my house on Sunday.  I felt her presence in  body only.  All I can do is continue to watch, wait, and pray.  Mostly pray.

Dear God,  I want my children be OBSERVERS.  Help them to DISTINGUISH the truth from Satan's lies.   Show them the importance of IDENTIFYING with you and not with this world, as well as, the importance of ACCEPTING the responsibilities that come with being children of the King, REALIZING there will be consequences for their actions.  If you choose to reveal your plan to us in the future, the reason for this journey and the trials we have faced on it, please allow this family to be AWARE of how you used it to change us.  Protect my children in the present and help them in the future to UNDERSTAND.  Allow them to be willing to share their experiences so that others may KNOW you.  AMEN

Friday, May 7, 2010


My mother: Brenda
My mother-in-law: Lillie
My step-mother: Minnie

My grandmother: Irene
My grandmother: Daisy
My step-grandmother: Lilllian
My step-mother: Elaine
My sister-in-law's mother: Betty

Sunday, May 2, 2010


This blog was created because of my daughter and her life choices. It has been devoted to my journey along the way. In the beginning there was rebellion; there was separation; there was hurt; there was anger,disbelief, and confusion.

She made a bad choice and her heart belonged to God. Her mind and heart clashed. Because of this clash or rebellion she became a mean spirited person, especially towards those of us who would verbally disapprove. She also hid from us - just as Adam and Eve did, ashamed of their actions, knowing they were wrong and not wanting to face their Father. In the beginning the hurt and pain were so intense that separation was ok with me. Because of my anger and disbelief an "out of sight out of mind" attitude was my way of coping. I was confused to the point that I could not figure out how I could ever manage a relationship with her outside of accepting her choices. There was a HUGE hole in my heart, one that only God could fill. And He did!

He directed me back to her. I never stopped loving her. I stopped letting her know I loved her. He showed me how to build a bridge. The bridge she would walk across, the one that would carry her to the other side of her bad choices. A bridge like the one He builds for me, the bridge of unconditional love. He began to show me that I did not have to accept her choices and I did not have to understand them but I HAD to love her through to the other side of them with the confidence and knowledge that with His help I could do it. She would reach the other side a better person, I would be a better person, and God would get the glory for it all.

She has not yet made it to the other side, although I like to think she is close. She is presently suffering from the consequences of her choices, trapped in conditions she cannot figure out how to free herself from. And I have learned along the way that I cannot carry her across. I can; however, be the solid foundation that will get her there. I will love her,encourage her, and pray for her until I know she has made it safely to the other side. My heart's greatest desire is that some day she will use her life experiences to rescue others from making the same mistakes or giving those who already have the hope that they too can cross to the other side.

I said all of this... to share this: The birthday card, or booklet, she gave me for my birthday last week.

It speaks volumes in regards to what God has done in our lives and just how far she has come on what I want to believe is the last leg of this journey.  For me it was not only a birthday card from my daughter, it was also God wrapping his arms around me and kissing me on the cheek!

Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday!
My Hero My Friend My Mom
LOVE is what happens while you're living day by day.
Time goes by too fast.

Little Girl Days
"Mommy & Me" days -
they all blend together
into one long, happy time
when I felt protected
& learned the world was a safe place
where love held me up
& never let me down.

Everything I am today
is because of that
unconditinal love.
It was there at the beginning
& made me able
to grow into who I am now.

Becoming Friends
If there's one thing
a girl needs
during those tough years
of growing up,
it's someone who
boosts her confidence
when it feels
like the rest
of the world
is conspiring against her.
Someone patient enough
to keep on loving
& guiding through
good days & bad.
In other words,
a great mom.

Some True Things
Picture this:
Years from now,
us sitting on a porch somewhere,
laughing, telling old stories,
having gotten through
to the other side of life
where there's time enough
for sifting & sorting
& examining each memory
like the treasure it is.
Here's something today
for you to pack away
in your memory kit -
I want you to have it now:

I love you so much.
I always have. I always will.

Signed: "Happy 50th!! I love you!! K