For some strange reason (at least I thought it strange at the time) these words from this gospel hymn that I have not heard or sang in a very long time came to my mind earlier in the day.
Tonight I understand. They were a glimpse into what was to come.
Tonight we talked. We laughed. We cried. I heard her say things I never thought to ever hear her say.
I will not be able to record the conversation in its entirety, but I will remember and write as much as I possibly can.
She told me it was as if she had been asleep for over two years and was NOW awake.
She regrets the lost time.
She told me it HAD to happen.
She needed to hit rock bottom to wake her up to truly get it, to understand how blessed and wonderful her life was.
With all the gusto in the world she desires to get K (herself) back.
She told me she has already left her current situation mentally and emotionally, but physically it could not happen until September.
She has made plans to share an apartment with a high school friend.
This friend has played an important part in her "finding herself" once again.
She stays with this friend often, but for complex reasons (reasons that I completely understand) (reasons that are legitimate and not just excuses) she cannot do anything permanent until September.
We talked about and cried over a person who plays a key role in her current situation.
She is tormented over the condition of this person's soul.
I am tormented over the condition of this person's soul.
I know in the future we will both pray that someone will come into __________ life and share Christ and He will be accepted.
She has a tremendous amount of compassion for others, including this one she needs separation from.
She recognizes Satan and how He is at work. There is a dying grandmother and a sister who has just been diagnosed with cancer in this person's life.
She understands total and complete separation from this person will have to take place.
Tomorrow is her last day at her full time job.
She is excited.
They are giving her a going away party.
She read me the e-mail she composed for her co-workers. She has a gift for words!
She starts a new part time job this week.
Her co-workers at the current job are sad about her leaving and her new co-workers are excited about her coming. This tells so much about what kind of person she is. People love her.
I love her!!
She knows there is a reason for her life going in the direction it did. She accepts the fact that if she can save just one person from making the mistakes she did, it will have been worth it.
Her threshold for pain is minus zero. I know this. She knows this.
Still she desires to have a tattoo removed, one that could have an impact on her future, one that she is ashamed of.
She is in awe of how amazing God is.
She is aware of His timing.
She understands it was not until she reached this point that He would open the doors that have miraculously opened.
Prior to tonight's conversation she had already shocked me with her willingness to give away some of her pets so she would not be hindered and could move forward with her plans. (I had the opportunity months ago to talk to her in length about this and at the time she was closed minded in regards to giving one of them up much less three)
Tonight came an even bigger shock. She has been given an opportunity to give the one pet she vowed to never part with, a one hundred pound golden retriever, a home. She recognizes this as another door God has opened and she is willing to walk through it. The situation is so absolutely flawless for her and the dog. I am amazed!
She begins school in August.
She possibly has another job opportunity that could be "just what the doctor ordered" while she is in school.
I know I will probably think of something else I will wish I had remembered while writing this, but I think you get the point.
I get the point.
O what a tender, compassionate friend-
He met the need of my heart;
Shadows dispelling, With joy I am telling
He made all the darkness depart!