Wish I May, Wish I Might

A good friend of mine has a fourteen year old son and here lately every time I talk to her on the phone she is either on her way to drop him off somewhere or on her way to pick him up. The other day while talking to her she was sitting in a parking lot waiting on him as he finished his ball practice. It brought back memories of the days when I, too, ran a taxi service for my children. They were not yet old enough to drive, but their social lives were busting at the seams. I wished for them to get their driver’s license and then when they did I wished to take that wish back.

I am pretty sure I have wished my way through every season in my life: Wishing I would graduate, wishing I was married, wishing I had a job, wishing I had a better job, wishing I could quit my job, wishing for children, wishing each stage of their lives to end, to move on to the next, wishing them grown, and then wishing they had not. And these are just some of the major ones. I think age has made me realize that all the phases or seasons I have experienced so far HAVE BEEN my life. I don’t know, maybe it just takes looking at them as past events to make one realize this.

I am on a journey right now with my daughter, an unwanted journey. Even though I struggle from time to time, I make a conscious effort to try not to get impatient in wanting it all to end. I do so badly want it to. I hate the time that is being wasted in her life, in our lives. But, so does God and for some reason He has allowed all of this and only He knows when and how it will end. All the wishing in the world, is not going to make it go away. So I have determined in my heart to camp out in this season of my life and watch God work and then share Him with others.

…we spend our years as a tale that is told. So teach us to number our days, that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom. Psalms 90:9b, 12.